Some say that communication is a necessary prerequisite for sentience, others say that it is a result thereof. In relationship, it is both.
Communication is the concept or state of exchanging data or information between entities according to the dictionary.
Communication is highly essential in relationship as it’s the possession of consciousness or sensory awareness between two hearts that need to reason as one. A good relationship strengthens all aspect of life; your health, your mind and your work. It is a tremendous drain when it isn’t supportive. It gets better or worse depending on how much or how little we understand and invest in them.
How you felt about people who cared for you as an infant may have shaped your expectations of love. If there is no communication how do you expect your partner to understand your view and or perspective about love? He/she wasn’t there when you were a child. It doesn’t bite to tell your partner what you feel or tink because if you truly love each other then you won’t take offence as to what you feel rather you will respect each other’s feelings. Your expectations of love may have become coloured by your experience as a child and your caretaker is not that of your partners so you both might have quite different experiences and views about love, what you expect from relationship is what you are likely to get but you must first communicate it.
Falling in love is one thing, preserving that love is another and communication, i mean clear communication is one of the things that will preserve that relationship. You have to be willing to invest your time, energy and to focus on the relationship, communicate what you feel as well as what you think. Tell your partner what you need, don’t make them guess.
It’s not always easy to talk about what we need and a times it makes us feel vulnerable, embarrassed or ashamed to speak out. We fall in love looking and listening to one another and if we continue to look and listen in the same attentive and approving ways as we started, we will sustain the “falling in love” experience.
Communication is not just talking all the time, there are other activities that is also communication like finding something that you enjoy doing together, trying something new together can be fun to connect and keep things interesting.
Many people struggle to communicate this needs to their partner because they shy away from conflict and wouldn’t want to trouble or inconvenience others. They constantly let other peoples need supersede there’s. In a relationship where misunderstanding of words is the order of the day, partners won’t feel free to pour out there minds and that leads to unhealthy relationship which may eventually destroy the whole building. You have the right to speak up, in fact you have a responsibility to yourself and your partner to be clear about how you feel. You are the expert on yourself and your partner should have respect and reason with you, the two should talk about your feelings and not turn against each other because it will simply turn to issues in your relationship. No one else, not even your partner can read your mind and know what you need in the way of support, domestic orders, independence, privacy, time out, intimate contact and lots more so please…communicate.
Issues are those little things that build up and least to a big fight and eventual breakup and poor communication is a big factor that raises issues. You know your partner and the manner you can talk to him/her that can cause injury in your walk together. The words and tone we use matters a lot. It can either heal or wound a troubled heart for example: you suck lately and i hate it can simply be said as i haven’t been understanding you these few days and am worried. Don’t vent or explode to your partner in a vague or accusatory way, it’s never productive.
Trust issues destroy lots of relationships. Who your partner was doesn’t necessarily means he/she still is. If he/she was a flirt and meter changed, any suspicion that may arise letter doesn’t mean u should simply conclude that your partner is back to the old habit. You need to take your time and know what is going on, evaluate first why you don’t trust your partner anymore, reflect on it and talk with your partner because you are both involved and need to trust each other and it’s much easier if you both act in a trustworthy manner.
One way to develop trust if for you both to be reliable and follow through want you said you will, this will teach you to depend on each other.
PS: don’t set up rules before you start a relationship, wen u fall in love naturally the rules will fall into place after not at the start point. You are not a partner in a firm, you are giving your heart to someone you care about.
Some few trust issue quotes that can help
“Be all in or get all out. There is no halfway”
“Relationship fails because people take their own insecurities and try to twist them into their partner’s flaws”
“Hidden resentment poison a relationship: so if something bothers you, say it”
LOVE IS EASY AND DIFFICULT: DEPENDS ON HOW YOU LIVE YOUR LIFE AND LOVE DAILY
Written By: Chabiya Reuben